i've been thinking.

my girlfriend doesn't understand that i want to do dishes more than have sex. well, i think she might understand, but she doesn't respect it. sex isn't controlling the world, it's not putting things right that were once awry. it doesn't help me.

also,

i was thinking how the aikido post i made a few days ago was the worst thing on this blog so far. why? because it's boring. there's no human in it. sure, it's all true, but so (the fuck) what. no one wants to read about you becoming your ideal self. that's not interesting, that's self help. go watch a pilates vid (some woman trying to merge with the immaterial force using her abdominally powered pelvis), it's more interesting. if for nothing else than it's supreme ridiculousness.

on the other hand, no one wants to hear about how shitty your life is either. that's the quintessential blog raison d'être, and no one cares anymore (it's doubtful they ever did). ultimately, it's just bitching. and bitching (like self help) unless powered by industrial strength verbiage or humor, is boring.

however,

i think my nextdoor nieghbor raped a girl.

and that got your attention, didn't it.